germaphobe for life.

I now feel an appropriate time has gone by that I can share this story. It also helps I am in a new state (literally) and in a new season in life,  but it’s hard to say with social media around.

Around this time last year, I was asked to lead worship for our church Women’s Retreat. I of course was honored and freaked out all at the same time, but that’s another story for maybe never a time. : )

My mom and sister took the journey with me and we had such a blast together. I remember laughing so much, but I couldn’t even tell you about what. I think it was mindless and stupid stuff that only family or really close friends find hilariously funny when they are at the same level of delirium with you.

After a full Friday of working and traveling, leading worship and listening to the speaker, we got back to our room that the 3 of us were sharing. Somehow I ended up in my own bed, not sure how that happened because usually the mom gets that honor. However, you’ll see why it was a good thing for her . . .

Now, if you know me even a little, you will know I’m a bit of a germaphobe. And I married one too. Public bathrooms, hotels, hotel beds, planes, etc . . . they all just gross me out. I have been known to yank off the comforter on the bed immediately (don’t tell me you haven’t read those MSN articles about maids that tell all . . . you know!!!) and then I rip back the sheets and investigate. If it’s remotely dirty I ask for a new set of sheets.

This particular time, I remember pulling back the sheets, but didn’t see anything and decided it was clear . . . oh how wrong I was.

I settled in, Mom was about to turn off the lights and Sister was already half asleep. And then it happened.

I moved my feet all the way down to the end of the bed and my feet found something wadded up down at the bottom. Without even thinking about it, I reached down there with my hands and pulled out the wad – an item in each hand. Slowly I pulled it out and then it registered what it was . . . Adidas MEN’S SOCKS?!?!?!?!

I have never in my life dropped and thrown something so fast in my life!

My mom and sister died laughing, to the point they nearly wet their pants and I was appalled to the point of screaming?!

And then of course my mind began racing . . . were these sheets never washed?! Did someone sneak in our room and take a nap?! Oh Lawd, did the bathroom get cleaned?! And on and on and on my mind went.

But here I am the guest worship leader and all the rooms are rented out for this retreat . . . what am I to do?! I pondered sleeping in my car. But just decided to fully clothe myself and sleep in the fetal position all night . . . which means I think I slept about 30 minutes.

I’m telling you, if it’s gonna happen to someone, it will happen to me.

So, new thing added to the ever growing and long checklist: Check the end of the bed for dirty socks.

P.S. Later that night, Mom was complaining about being cold and wishing she had a pair of socks and I said, "Oh, I have an extra pair!" "Oh good . . . you do?" (totally not getting it) "Yep, down at the end of the bed on the floor."